Iron Twilight, Grey Dawn
by 2ns
Summary: "You've been too long alone in the shadows. Come back into the light with me." Rey and Ben have torn the First Order from the sky. Now they must struggle with the consequences of what they have done to help the galaxy rebuild from the ashes of war. REYLO.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Iron Twilight, Grey Dawn picks up immediately after the end of Two Sides of the Same Coin.**

When a hero ends an epic journey, we like to see them raise their glass and drink to the future. We assume that they will settle down to a life of peace and bliss, but sadly, in the ashes of war, there is often no home to return to, no matter how glorious your victory was. Rebuilding after the desolation of war isn't done at the end of a lightsaber. It's done through grueling hours over maps and lists with bad coffee in the small hours, shivering in tents against the rage of a snow storm. Pretty stories make war sound glorious, and the grueling task of rebuilding is ignored, as though cities and crops will spring from the scorched earth beckoned by hope and dreams alone. Treaties are written in blood and dusted with ash. Compromises must be made that turn stomachs, and sometimes what rises from the ashes looks too much like what was torn down. I think people are hoping that Ben and Rey will be able to settle down to domestic bliss. That's not what the dregs of war looks like. If you think it's going to be that easy, you haven't been paying attention. This isn't going to go the way think it's going to. Buckle up.

x-x-x-x-x-x

In the early hours after their rescue from the Battle of Urobos Prime, Ben had risen from the deck of the Millennium Falcon's cargo bay and carried his wife to what had been his parent's quarters. He was surprised that when he punched in his own personal access code the door opened, the code still active after all these years.

"Ben?"

Ben untied Rey's obi and unwound it from her body, laying it aside with her saber and belt. _I'm here_. Rey groaned softly as he eased her arms out of the overtunic of her padawan robes. She leaned forward and rested her head on his shoulder as he slid the undertunic off her shoulders.

 _I hurt._

 _I know. We killed millions. You wouldn't think so, but when there is a massive reaving from the Force, there will be a physical toll if the Force flows through you the way it does through us. You should take it easy for a few days._

Ben felt Rey's wry amusement. _Stay in bed with you, you mean_.

Ben smiled. _As much as I'd enjoy that, I don't think that's going to be an option. I don't think anyone has realized yet the implications of destroying the First Order_.

Rey stretched and groaned again as Ben drew the blankets up over her. _This is much better than the floor of the cargo bay_.

 _I thought it might be_.

Rey sighed with contentment when Ben slid into bed beside her moments later and drew her close. _What implications?_

She felt his reluctance. Ben stroked a warm hand down her shoulder and arm and pressed a kiss into her hair. _We controlled every shipment of every commodity. We manipulated the economies of every system to ensure that not a single one would be capable of self-sufficiency. It ensured their reliance on us. Every system will be on the brink of famine within a standard year. Some will be there within a few months. That's why I didn't want to tear down the Order in a single fell stroke; it needed to be untangled slowly_.

Rey was wide awake now. _There were stories that Jakku had once been green and lush. The old women used to tell wild tales of a land in their grandmother's time covered in grain, rather than sand. Is that true?_

Ben's hand stilled on Rey's shoulder, and his answer was tense. _Yes_.

 _Who would do such a thing?_

 _Jakku's water was decimated by the Empire._

 _What about the rest of the systems? The Empire didn't even have a solid grip on many of those systems._

 _That was me._

 _You?_

When Rey turned in his arms and looked at him, she looked betrayed, and he felt her shock, sharp and barbed through their bond. Ben rolled onto his back and looked up at the ceiling rather than face her _. Hux's job was to sweep in with his armies and decimate a system. I sometimes took part in fleet strikes, but more often, my role was to ensure a system's compliance once it fell to the Order. I looked for the system's weaknesses and developed strategies to undermine them. Hux thought that it was enough to crush a system and move on. It was left to me to figure out how to cripple the people and ensure that there was no possibility for them to rise up again. That's why Hux barely questioned it when I left for Eurillis; he assumed that I was continuing my duties of keeping systems subdued._

Rey sat up and pulled the blankets around her. Ben had wrapped a veil around his feelings, and his face was serene. She sensed that beneath the veil, there was anguish, but she couldn't stop her thoughts from tumbling through their bond. _Children starved because of what you did. People were too weak to even dig graves, and the bodies were left in the Great Sands so that the wind would scour the bones clean. I knew women that had as many as eight boxes beneath their beds, with tiny bones bound together with twine. You did that._

He continued to look stubbornly up at the ceiling, and his lips were compressed into a thin line. _I did that. I felt every one of those sparks flicker and go out, and I carry their ashes in my heart_. Ben turned his face to look at Rey, and he dropped the barrier between them. In his mind, she saw a vast grey plain beneath a glowering iron twilight, and in the plain stood Ben, alone. The wind was harsh, and it carried an acrid grit that it scraped from the barren ground and threw into her eyes and nose and mouth. _This is where I keep my dead. The remnants of the souls I have been forced to extinguish. Even if I could atone for a death for every second for the rest of my life, I could live hundreds of years and still not be properly shriven for what I have done_.

 _We just added millions to your toll_.

 _Yes. I cannot reclaim the souls that were lost, but if you will help me, I can try to undo the damage that was done._

 _And if we can't?_

Ben flicked his eyes back at her. _Millions more will die, and it will be worse than before. They will start to long for the days of the First Order, when regular shipments of civilian rations came with First Order insignias and when storm troopers regulated the flow of water. From the First Order's ashes will rise a new, more brutal master who will promise to return the galaxy to stability, if only they will pledge their loyalty to him. In their desperation, as their children die of hunger and thirst, they will believe his promises, and they gladly line up for their own destruction._

 _Who?_

Ben spread his hands briefly. _Who knows.? It is the way of wicked men to step into the breach when there is chaos and suffering to offer hope that benefits only themselves_.

Rey didn't respond. When she laid down, Ben was relieved that she once again laid her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arm around him, though he could feel her mind humming quietly and tension ran the length of her body. Even with her pressed against him, it felt as though a chasm had opened between them.

"I told you I was a monster."

Rey sighed. "We all do things we are ashamed of to survive." She expanded her consciousness to touch Ben's, and she felt the wary fear that still lingered in his mind that even now, she would abandon him. Rey turned his face to accept her soft kiss, and she felt through their bond how badly he needed her reassurance, how grateful he was for her unwavering love. "You'd only be a monster if you didn't regret what you had done. You've been too long alone in the shadows." With a hand on his shoulder, Rey encouraged Ben to turn and face her. When he obliged, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. "Come back into the light with me."


	2. Chapter 2

In the following days, Ben grew unsettlingly quiet. Rey made an effort to help where she could with building the thriving relationship between the transplanted Rebels and the liberated storm troopers of Eurillis, but Ben spent much of his time bent over the table in their quarters, writing out page after page of notes on the rough paper that the local population made. In the evenings, they sat at the back of the daily briefings, and while he listened with one ear, he continued working at the increasingly thick sheaf of notes.

During the briefings, Ben never spoke up, but Rey was certain he was filing away everything that was said and who it was said by. After the ordeal of healing their bond, Rey had found that for now, physical separation made them both anxious and jittery. By the time they came together over the evening meal, one or both of them were visibly shaking, and physical contact seemed to be the only balm for the tension that vibrated through their raw bond. Throughout the meetings, Ben's tidy Aurebesh would crawl across the page with one hand, but his other hand would be clasped around hers, hidden in the folds of his cloak.

Finn cornered Rey one evening after Ben had retired unusually early. Nodding at his retreating back, Finn murmured, "He's not looking so good."

Rey shook her head. "What we did, it nearly destroyed both of us. We felt the death of every person on every ship, and each one tore a hole in the Force . . . and in us. He could give you a list of their names. When we dream . . ." Rey looked haunted. " . . . we dream of places we've never seen and people we've never known. The dead live there in our minds." Rey shrugged uncomfortably. "He's not sleeping much."

Finn glanced down the curving hall, though Rey could feel Ben was already dropping into a fitful doze in their bed. "He's not eating either, as far as I can tell." When Rey shook her head, Finn continued, "Is that what he's writing—is he making a list of the dead?"

"No. I've only scanned bits and pieces, but I think he's trying to reconstruct the action plans he had made for the conquest of various systems under Snoke. Sometimes I find him awake at odd hours working on it. I think Ben thinks that if he can remember everything that was done, he can find a way to reverse the damage. He's particularly worried about Gamorr and Rishi. He says that with the First Order trade routes disrupted, those are the first systems that will be struck by famine." Rey looked down at her clasped hands that had already begun to tremor now that Ben had retired. "We've both been feeling some kind of disturbance from Korriban, and I think that's really what is keeping him from sleeping."

Finn had noticed Rey's trembling before when she and Ben were separated, and didn't comment, though it worried him. "What's on Korriban?"

Rey straightened and reached for her empty cup, intending to rise and fill it. "We don't know; that's why we're worried. Ben says it is the sacred homeworld of the Sith, but it was thought that the line of the Sith was ended generations ago. Whatever is stirring there can't be good for the rest of us, with the entire galaxy in tatters. Neither of us could deal with a fully trained Sith in our current state. Even with a lifetime of training, Ben's not really a fully trained master in either discipline. Luke trained him, but Luke never completed his own training. Skywalker's first master, Ben Kenobi, was killed after training Luke for only a few days. He trained for weeks with the last surviving Jedi, someone Ben calls Yoda, but Yoda apparently died from old age before Luke could finish his training."

"What about Ben's training with Snoke?"

Rey's hands shook so badly as she poured water from the jug that Finn had to take it from her and finish filling her cup. She nodded her thanks and sat again beside him. "We don't talk about what Snoke did to him. What I know are from memories that I stole from his mind when I was angry with Leia, and it looked more like years of physical and emotional torture than what you'd consider proper training. A dark master guards his secrets jealously, afraid of the day his student is strong enough to rise up against him. I think Snoke put more of his time and effort into Ilfa Ren because he considered her less of a threat."

Finn didn't answer right away. Rey looked up and saw him watching Rose, enchanted. Rose was seated with Issaa and had a spanner wrench and a couple of burnt out motivators that she had been trying to repair rotating slowly in the air between them. It turned out that Issaa was a bit of a savant when it came to the Force. She seemed to be able to teach just about anyone how to tap their own thread of the Force adequately to do simple tasks like levitating and summoning small objects. Rose had proven to be particularly receptive, while Finn seemed to be utterly unable to even find his thread. His lips were slightly parted as he watched her, and Rey could feel awe and love for Rose pouring from him.

Rey smiled. "She's good. If she keeps up like this, Ben's going to have to work on making more kyber so we can construct her a saber. He's gotten much better since he made the ones that are in his saber."

"She's incredible."

Rey took a strip of dried seaweed from a ration pack that had been left open on the table and nibbled at it. "She is. Her innate connection to the Force is what saved us after Urobos Prime. We owe her our lives."

When Finn once again failed to answer, engrossed in watching Rose, Rey stood and followed Ben to bed. Finn didn't realize she had left for nearly a half an hour.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

By the time Rey curled up beside Ben, the tremors in her hands had extended into spasms that ran all the way to her shoulders. Ben woke and felt her shaking.

"Is it bad tonight?"

"Mmmhmm. Was it like this for you after Hosnian Prime?"

Ben massaged her arms, and Rey felt relief almost instantly. "Yeah, but it stopped after a couple of days. I wonder if this is lasting longer because it's bouncing back and forth between us. Maybe we should try to pull up a barrier between our minds for a few days to see if it helps."

"We can try, but I like it better when the barrier is down." Ben didn't respond, but pressed her head down into his shoulder. After a few minutes, Rey continued, "How's it coming with the plans?"

Ben sighed and tugged at bands in her hair to free it. "No one is going to be thrilled with me when I suggest it, but I think that if we don't go to Gamorr soon, the famine will be a certainty, and the last thing we want is for some of the most brutal mercenaries in the Outer Rim to be starving and looking to bargain with the first people they see."

"Are they likely to welcome us?"

Ben snorted. "They are likely to try to kill us as soon as we land."

"Just like old times then."

Rey had startled Ben into genuine laughter, and he squeezed her tight, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I'd like it if we could get a break from the 'old times'. It doesn't feel like they've stopped."

"What about the Rishii? Would it be easier to start there?"

"Maybe. Rishii is a little closer, and they are somewhat friendlier." Ben yawned broadly. "Let's sleep on it and approach Finn and Poe with it in the morning. Neither of us are needed on Eurillis, and with the harvest nearly in, we will have something available to use as an initial trade with whomever we approach. If we can at least start trade negotiations and make sure industry continues in each system, it will be easier to build bridges between the systems."

Ben's mirth still wrapped comfortably around her consciousness, and Rey realized that the tension that had been buzzing through her mind and body had substantially eased. _Maybe we just need some good luck for a change._

Ben snorted sleepily through their bond and he drew Rey tighter into his arms. _You'd better tell me when you see it coming so I can behave appropriately. The last time something good came my way, I knocked her out, kidnapped her, and then tried to murder her. I don't think I know how to react appropriately to good luck._

Rey snuggled closer, enjoying the glow of his pleasure as it enveloped her. She smiled. _Maybe you're just out of practice._


	3. Chapter 3

In the end, it was decided that Rishii, with its mountains rich with exonium, would be the best place to start. When Ben and Rey approached the cargo bay, they were surprised to find Rose waiting for them.

"You're going like that?" When Rey and Ben looked at one another in confusion, Rose gestured at Ben from head to foot and elaborated, "You look like Kylo Ren."

Ben narrowed his eyes. "I'm well aware of that."

Though she tried to repress it, having Kylo Ren looming over her, is glaring down at her and growling in annoyance made a fluttery sense of panic rise in Rose. She pushed down her unease and tried again. "I mean you still look like you are the Supreme Leader here to subdue these people. If you want people to trust you, you can't approach them looking like you'd as soon execute them as look at them."

"You want me to change."

Rey covered her mouth and couldn't help a fit of giggles from bubbling up. Ben felt her fizzing through the bond and he turned to look at her, incredulous. "I'm sorry. Look, see what Han had. You're only a couple of inches taller than your father was. Surely you can find something that fits. I think there's even a couple of Skywalker's Jedi tunics and a tabard stashed in one of the drawers in the crew's quarters if you'd prefer."

 _Those are my choices. You want me to dress like my father, who I murdered, or my uncle, who tried to murder me._

Rey's eyes danced _. I doubt Chewie has anything suitable._

Ben glanced between Rey and Rose, and Rey saw the corner of his mouth twitch in amusement. He huffed before stalking back out of the cargo bay. When Rey and Rose glanced at one another, they both burst into laughter.

 _I can still hear you._

Rey doubled over in hilarity, flapping her hand at Rose. "Shhh—He can hear us!" Instead of calming their nervous laughter, Rey's comment only inflamed it into gales. Rey clasped hands with Rose and they sat rocking together on the deck of the cargo bay. Rose looked up to see Finn standing in the door to the cargo bay, his jaw slack at the sight of the two women hysterical on the floor, and she lost what remained of her composure.

"I'm sorry!" Rose gasped between gales of laughter. "He's just so—intimidating. No one would believe that he was there to negotiate anything."

Rey wiped tears away with the heel of her hand. "You're right. It just didn't occur to either of us. Oh, it feels good to laugh. I haven't laughed, really laughed since . . ." Rey thought of the her first lesson with Luke on Ahch-Tu and her first time manning the gunner's cannon while Han flew the Falcon, but both memories were bittersweet. "I can't remember, really."

Sobering, Rose lifted her chin in the direction of the cargo bay door. "Does . . . Ben ever laugh?" Rey could feel that it was still difficult for Rose to think of him as Ben and not Kylo Ren.

Rey smiled gently, her mind split between Ben's consternation back in their quarters as he ripped clothes out of drawers searching for something more appropriate and memory of the few times she'd heard Ben really laugh, not just a snort of amusement through their link. "He does. It's not often, and only when we're alone, but when he does, it's the best sound in the world." She felt Ben pause as he tried on one of Han's shirts, listening to the conversation more closely now through their bond. Rey patted her chest over her heart. "I feel it here when he does. Nothing makes me happier."

 _I didn't know that._

Rey glanced up and saw Ben present before her, though she knew he stood in their quarters. She smiled again. _It's true. Hurry up before we're out of the mood to go. The Rishii delegation will be expecting us soon._

A few minutes later, Rey realized that Ben had returned when she noticed Rose gaping up at the door to the cargo bay in astonishment. Rey grinned when she turned and saw him. He was still terrifying, but not in a First Order kind of way. He had exchanged his First Order officer's coat for a weathered long brown leather jacket that probably would have reached nearly to Han's his knees, but hung just past Ben's hips. He'd also strapped on one of Han's side arm belts that buckled just above his knee, complete with a blaster. His saber was clipped on behind his hip, but the length of the jacket hid it.

Ben raked a glance over Rose. "Is this adequate?"

Rose seemed unable to answer as she gawked up at him, so Rey said, "Yes. It's much better." Glancing down at the blaster, she asked, "When was the last time you used one of those?"

"It's been a few years, but I assure you, I'm an excellent shot."

"Let's hope we don't need to shoot anyone." Finn had returned with Chewie, but the Wookiee stopped short when he saw Ben standing in the cargo bay in Han's clothes.

Chewie approached Ben slowly, his bowcaster in his hand. Ben dropped his eyes in shame, unable to look at Chewie. Since Han's death, he'd scrupulously avoided crossing paths with the Wookiee, using the Force to guarantee it. Now that he was here with Rey, sleeping in his parents' quarters, Ben knew he could hardly continue to avoid Chewie, especially since the Wookiee's berth was on the other side of the hallway from theirs. Truth be told, when he'd been left behind with Skywalker to begin his training, Ben had missed the Wookiee every bit as much as he had his parents. He doubted that Chewie would kill him for murdering Han, at least not in front of the women, but Ben could feel the Wookiee's emotions tumble within him. Anger, resentment, sorrow, betrayal, scorn, disappointment, and something that was like relief.

Rey took Ben's hand and squeezed it. _It's fine. I think you just surprised him. He thought you were Han at first_.

Chewie crossed the cargo bay to Ben cautiously, and moaned softly.

Ben nodded jerkily. "I'm home." After a longer moan, Ben looked up in surprise, his brows drawn down. "No, I don't."

When Rey grinned, Rose asked, "What did he say?"

Rey beamed. "Chewie said Ben looks like his father, when he was younger."

Chewie wailed briefly and wrapped an arm around Ben, pulling him awkwardly against his chest. Rose's eyes widened in astonishment. "I guess that means he's not going to kill him today."

Rey laughed, "He hasn't decided, but since I'm fond of him, he'll try not to."

Ashamed, Ben asked, _Why?_

Rey smiled sadly through their bond. _Because he loves you. I think that neither he nor your parents could ever believe that Ben Solo and Kylo Ren were truly the same person. He sees that Kylo Ren is gone, and you are home. That's all he needs to know_.

 _But I killed my father. I killed his best friend._

Rey squeezed Ben's hand. _But in his heart, you were as much his son as theirs_.

Disentangling himself gently from the Wookiee, Ben mumbled, "Let's go."


	4. Chapter 4

"So what are the Rishii like? They are like bird-people, right? Are they friendly? Are they aggressive? Is that why there's not a First Order outpost on Rishii?"

Ben was leading them down a barely discernable path through the dense vegetation. The path was only marked out by a magnetic monorail, entirely grown over with vegetation and a cable that ran overhead from the landing pad to the depot nearly a half a mile deeper into the jungle. Even though the sweltering heat indicated that the system's sun was boring down upon them, the canopy was so thick that without the ancient, rusting lights that swung from the cable, they'd be plunged into the black heart of the jungle.

Ben drew his brows together and glowered down at Finn. He'd noticed before that the former storm trooper had a tendency to babble when he was nervous, and Ben was beginning to wonder why Finn had been chosen as the mouthpiece for the expedition. "The Rishii are a highly intelligent though somewhat primitive species. They are friendly and welcome trade with off-worlders. Since cloning was shut down on Kamino decades ago, Rishii has little tactical value. They willingly trade their natural resources in vastly greater quantities than the First Order required, so Snoke saw no advantage to subduing a pliant non-human population. It used to be a haven for pirates and smugglers, but after a few skirmishes, the pirates moved on and the First Order moved in. There's no barracks or outpost, but the First Order built its mining franchise in the valleys."

Rey caught Finn's eyeroll directed at Ben's back and her lips twitched as she tried to hide her amusement. When asked a question, Ben often adopted a monotonous tone as he regurgitated information that she knew would have been easily accessible from the Supremacy's databanks. Even though he knew that they couldn't be faulted for not having knowing what he did, being their personal databank still grated on Ben's nerves. He would often take a deep breath before responding to a question he found particularly ignorant or even plainly stupid, but he always had adequate self-control to answer civilly. She had also caught Ben chewing on the side of his cheek or mouth a number of times, and she realized that he was physically restraining himself from issuing a direct command or chastising someone as he would have done as a member of high command. It was awkward, but he was trying to fit in.

For their part, Finn and Rose were struggling with the concept of threatening, dangerous Kylo Ren displaced from the bowels of the First Order and walking amidst them. More than once, when Ben walked into a room and spoke, she'd seen Finn visibly flinch in fear, so conditioned was he to being in proximity to Kylo Ren. Tiny Rose, more than a foot shorter than Ben, was intimidated equally by Ben's size, his brusque demeanor, and no doubt Finn's stories. Chewie, neither intimidated by Ben's physicality or connections to the First Order, was cautious of him for other reasons. Rey felt the Wookiee watching Ben carefully, but hopefully. Rey knew that they were all making a special effort to work together and be civil for her sake, and she was grateful.

"Have you been here before?" Rey had asked the question of Ben, but it was Chewbacca who had answered in a longer than usual tonal moan. Glancing up, Rey noticed that Chewie was obliged to duck under the swinging lights, and he gestured in the direction of the valley, which could have been reached by a different path.

"Oh." When Rose looked expectantly at Rey, she explained, "Han and Chewie had been here a number of times before the First Order routed the pirates, but the trade in exonium is so loosely regulated, there wasn't much profit to be had in moving it."

Rose glanced at Ben, her mouth open to ask a question, but thought better of it. She tried again, but tripped over the monorail. Cursing softly in annoyance, she blurted out, "Then why are we here?"

Ben took a deep breath. Rey could feel that he was nervous about revealing his motives. "The natives are headed for a famine. Now that the First Order won't be supplementing their natural food sources with civilian rations . . ." He spoke quietly to his feet as they sank out of sight into the thick vegetation. "There's already been too many senseless deaths." Ben knew that every eye was riveted on him, but he spoke into the electric silence nonetheless. "There are mining operations throughout the planet to regulate exonium extraction and refinement. If they take up arms against the natives to increase mining quotas, the natives could become slaves of the human minority."

Finn looked at Ben, his eyes hard. "Or they could be wiped out entirely."

Ben tightened his mouth and nodded curtly. "There will be hundreds, maybe thousands of species that are going to find themselves at the mercy of their on-world oppressors, only now, there won't be anyone holding them in check."

Rose's eyes widened in horror. "I thought that when the First Order was destroyed, everything was going to be better. It sounds like you're telling us people might actually end up being even worse off."

Ben exchanged a loaded glance with Rey. She lifted her brows expectantly. _Tell them_.

"The Resistance never had a plan beyond defeating the First Order. No one really had any idea what was going to come next. They would never have had the means to rebuild even a single system once the dust settled. They had a vague notion that if the Order was removed, everyone would just go back to the Republic system, and peace would prevail."

Rose swatted irritably at an iridescent yellow insect that was buzzing around her ear. "Why wouldn't it?"

Ben pursed his lips and shrugged his head. "The Republic didn't fall because of the Empire, and the Resistance didn't fail because of the First Order. Democracy failed because most individuals are more concerned about their own problems than about the good of everyone as a whole. Some systems actually prospered under First Order rule. Other systems were too embroiled in their own petty squabbles to come together to defeat an oppressor. Right now, you don't have freedom, you have chaos." Ben glanced over his shoulder at Rose as he trudged through the thick vegetation. "The First Order may be dead, but so is the Republic. You have no idea what is coming."

"We aren't here to unite the systems?" Finn stopped beneath one of the lights. "What the hell has all of this been for then? What have we been fighting for?"

Ben wiped away the sweat that was running down his face in annoyance. "I don't know what you're fighting for." He continued quietly, but the dark and the humidity pressed in on them, and they held his words close in the thick air. "I was pulled into the First Order because I had nowhere else to go. Just like everyone else, I did what I was told, even though I knew it was wrong because the alternative was death." Ben glanced nervously at Rey, and she could feel that it terrified him to reveal so much of what he was feeling to people who had been mortal enemies not so long ago. "When Rey touched me, the only thing I wanted was to find a way save the two of us. I killed a lot of people along the way." Ben's chin trembled and he tightened his mouth. "More than I can count. Now I'm just trying to make sure that no one else dies because I tore down the only system of order in the galaxy so that we could be free." Ben sighed. "You have to decide for yourself what you're fighting for."

Rose reached out her hand tentatively and laid it gently on Ben's elbow, as though afraid he'd whip around and strike her. "You freed all of us from the First Order."

Ben flinched. He was still wary of being touched, and Rey could feel the effort it took on his part to not recoil from Rose's benign touch. He met her eyes briefly. "We destroyed the First Order. That doesn't make you free." Ben lengthened his stride and Rose released him. Rey could tell he needed a moment, so she let him go on ahead of them.

Finn glared at her. "What about you? Why are you here?"

Rey glanced in the direction Ben had gone, already absorbed into the jungle and the dark. "You know why I'm here."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

After another twenty minutes of fighting the dense underbrush, the path began to climb, and they soon found themselves at one of the First Order mining stations. Though the ground had obviously been cleared at some point in order to erect the station, the building was so thickly encrusted with vines, fungus, and various flora that had rooted into every crevice, it looked as though it had sprouted from the jungle floor itself.

Finn studied the structure critically. "This is the mining station?"

Before Ben could answer, an enormous bird-like creature landed heavily on the corner of the building and trilled loudly with a deep guttural sound. Immediately, two First Order officers and another humanoid emerged from the building. The humanoid had pale gray skin and rows of long slender tentacles that cascaded from the back of his head and dressed in a long tunic of a coarse fibrous material. Through their bond, Ben explained, _Galandan_.

A second Rishii landed heavily beside one of the officers, and trilled familiarly to him. When the officer nodded, the Rishii drew himself up taller, shivering beneath his iridescent golden feathers. "Welcome to Rishi. I am Ortook, the senior elder of the Great Northern Nest."

Ben and Finn exchanged a surprised look. Both were shocked to see a First Order officer allowing a native to preempt him. Seeing the exchange, the officer whom had acknowledged Ortook stepped forward. "Supreme Leader." Ben pressed his eyes shut in extreme annoyance. "We understand that this is a grievous breach of protocol, but under the circumstances . . ." Rey noticed the officer's widened eyes as he took in Ben's appearance, out of uniform himself.

Ben cast a glare of frustration at Rose, and she quailed before he softly answered, "I'm not the Supreme Leader, as you no doubt were informed several weeks ago by divisional dispatch. I'm sure you are also aware that the fleet and central command have been destroyed; I am here in an unofficial capacity to see to the disposition of what remains of the First Order ground troops."

Rey looked down and saw both of Ben's hands clenched tightly, and she breathed into their bond, _Relax. We should have anticipated that this would happen_.

He shot an angry glare at her. _Exactly, and I should have been in uniform!_

"Of course, sir."

Ben glanced at the group, making swift calculations. "Commander Elsoth and I are looking forward to discussing your conditions." Ben nodded at Rey. "The rest of our party will be pleased to speak with the Rishii and Galandans."

Ortook dropped into a low formal bow, flourishing his plumage. "It would be our honor to meet with the Supreme Leader's delegation. Perhaps you would like to see the Great Northern Nest?"

Before she could stop herself, Rose spoke up. "Oh, yes, please."

Rey smiled and glanced at Ben. He glanced at the Rishii pointedly, taking in the taloned fingers at the end of their wings, their long sharp beaks, and their powerful wings. _Be careful_.

Rey glanced at the First Order officers, lifting her chin in the direction of their side arms and answered, _You too_.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

A few hours later, the natives and First Order representatives reconvened, and by the time Ben led them back through the sweltering jungle, they were all hot, tired, and dehydrated, but an easy accord had been reached.

It turned out that what remained of the First Order mining franchise on Rishi had already surmised that there would be no further supplies or reinforcements coming now that communications had been severed. They were on their own. The mining franchise agreed to cede several shipments of exonium to Ben's keeping with the understanding that he would see it exchanged for an initial shipment of some kind of porcine lifestock that would be bred in the valleys for the sustained sustenance of both the human colonists and the carnivorous Rishii. Agriculture was almost unheard of on Rishii because the natural flora of the planet grew so aggressively on anything not actively moving, so something omnivorous in nature that could survive the hot, damp climate would be necessary.

It turned out that it was fortunate Ben had arrived out of uniform in an unofficial capacity. The First Order captains had explained to Finn that though the planet was officially under First Order rule, in the past decade, the maungur population had grown completely out of control. Great herds of the nine foot behemoths had swept into the equatorial jungles, decimating the smaller game that the Rishii depended upon for their diet. Although the Rishii had traditionally prohibited the hunting of maungur, they had to finally permit it when the maungur overran an exonium refinery in one of the valleys and had eaten hundreds of humans and Galandans alike.

The maungurs, with their thick hides, were almost entirely impervious to the First Order's laser and sonic weapons. Only the Rishii's talons were capable of piercing their skin. The mining franchise was actually at the complete mercy of the Rishii, who patrolled the valleys from the air and ensured that the mountain slopes around the mines were safe. The Rishii famine was actually caused by strict adherence to their own religious practices and natural phenomena, rather than any cruelty on the part of the Order. A First Order planet it might have been, but the Rishii held its governance tightly in their grip.

It was decided that they would stay in the Falcon for the night, awaiting the mining franchise to deliver their cargo in the morning, whatever that meant, living beneath a canopy so dense that all but the Rishii lived in eternal night.


	5. Chapter 5

During the walk back to the Falcon, spirits were high, but Ben was quiet. Rey grasped his hand and pulled him close. "That was the best possible outcome. Aren't you happy?"

Ben glanced between Rose and Finn, his arm around her shoulders, and Chewie murmuring to them, far ahead. "I'm pleased that we were successful."

Rey pursued his mind through their bond, and felt that he was relieved, though she wasn't sure she would call it pleased. _What's troubling you?_

Ben tried to smile, but achieved only a pained grimace. _This is one planet in one system. It won't always be this easy. We've struck immediately while the pickings were easy, but there's not enough of us to leave someone behind to oversee what we've negotiated. There's no oversight; we can't trust that anyone will do what they've promised to do. This isn't what order looks like._

"Peace. This is what peace looks like."

Ben lengthened his stride and glanced back over his shoulder at Rey. "I wouldn't know."

Rey watched Ben climb up the ramp, puzzled. Finn caught her worried look, and glancing up at Ben as he passed, he trotted back down the ramp to Rey. "Hey, that went great. What's wrong with him?"

"I'm not sure." Rey followed Ben's mind as he strode back to their quarters. He sat down at the table, cleared of Han's brandy bottles and chipped glasses, and started making notes. "I think he's worried about the next time, that it won't be so easy. We haven't actually averted the famine he feared, just negotiated provisional government. He sees that the natives suffer, and he thinks he is to blame."

Finn leaned closer and murmured quietly, "Isn't he?"

Rey glanced up, anger flaring, but quickly extinguished when she met Finn's eyes. "I think there's plenty of blame to go around. Was it Ben whose greed started the entire nasty chain of events? Was it Ben who retreated into solitude rather than meet the threat of the First Order as it rose? Was it Ben who failed to provide leadership between the fall of the Empire and the rise of the Order? Did he build the ships that carried the Order into space or sell them the weapons they used to subdue the universe?" Rey's eyes hardened. "Was it Ben who submitted, rather than fighting until his last breath when the Order tried to take his home?" Rey shook her head. "It's too easy to lay all of this at Ben's feet. It's too much to lay at Kylo Ren's feet. Or even Hux's." Rey knew she had Ben's attention, so she pushed their bond open to see him bent over the table, poring over his notes. "What's done is done. You can't take the weight of it all on your shoulders."

Ben stood and crossed the room to her. "Maybe not, but it can be my responsibility to see it fixed."

Rey reached up and brought Ben's face closer to hers. "This is a tragedy that took lifetimes and legions to create. You're not going to be able to fix it alone in the time that is given to you." Rey kissed him gently, and then searched his eyes.

When Ben drew back from her, she could tell that he was touched, but his resolve was not softened. "I can try." Ben laid a feather soft kiss on her hair, and then faded softly back into their bond.

Rey had nearly forgotten that Finn was there, and when she met his eyes, he was quiet, thoughtful. "Do you still wonder why I love him?"

Finn shook his head. "No. I get it. I still don't like it, but I get it." When Rey turned away, Finn caught her arm and pulled her back. "Be careful. He'll die to see this made right; when he does, what will happen to you?"

"I'll probably be right beside him in the same grave."

Rey started up the ramp again, but this time was interrupted by Chewie, striding purposefully back out into the jungle with his bowcaster. Rey exchanged a startled look with Finn and asked Chewie, "Where are you going?"

Chewie turned back to her and gestured at the jungle with his bowcaster, responding in a fairly long sequence of tonal moans.

Rey drew her brows together. "Is it?" Chewbacca responded with a brief affirmative. Finn saw her eyes unfocus, and he knew that she must be searching Ben's mind for some kind of information. She blinked. "I guess it is. Huh."

When Chewie turned and disappeared into the dark jungle, Finn gaped at Rey. "What just happened?"

"Chewie is going hunting."

"Now? Why? We have plenty of rations—"

Rey was distracted. "What? Oh, there's rations, but that's not why he's going hunting." She grinned at Finn. "You'll see—if Chewie can find an excuse to hunt for fresh meat, he will. I'm half convinced that's why he lets the porgs stay. It's always a good idea to try to supplement our rations with whatever is fresh that we can get in port. That's not really why he's hunting now, though."

Finn glanced at where Chewie had disappeared into the jungle. "Fresh meat—is that safe?"

Rey grinned, remembering that Finn had likely never eaten anything other than standard First Order rations. "Yeah, it's safe. Chewie has a knack for knowing what the best game is no matter where we end up and how to bag it. He's not a half bad cook either." Rey started up the ramp.

Finn called after her, "Wait, why is he going hunting again?"

Rey turned, but continued up the ramp backwards. "Chewie says it's Ben's birthday."

Finn drew his brows together in disbelief. "It's Kylo Ren's birthday."

Rey shrugged and smiled. "I guess so. Chewie was there when Ben was born; he should know."


	6. Chapter 6

Hours later, Rey stood in the door of their quarters watching Ben work. She waited until he knocked together the sheaf of pages that he was working on. "Set that aside for now. Come to dinner."

 _I'm not hungry._

His response came without anger or resentment. It was almost devoid of any feeling at all.

Rey crossed the room to Ben. She ran a hand through his hair and bent to kiss him. _I miss the sound of your voice; I feel like you haven't spoken to me in days. You said more this afternoon on Rishi than I've heard you speak in a week_. Rey unfurled her affection and concern around his unconsciousness so that he would know it wasn't a rebuke. _She bent low and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing his neck. You haven't been eating or sleeping either. I miss you_.

 _I know. I'm sorry._

While she leaned on his shoulders, Rey scanned over the notes he had just set aside. _What's this?_ She ran a finger across a page of Aurebesh much more decorative than Ben's almost mechanical hand.

 _Finn received a distress call from the Corellians. Since it is industrialized, I had hoped that Corellia would be able to negotiate terms with what remains of the Order on their own. General Verlack has somehow managed to institute martial law, and is trying to ramp up production to force the Corellians to rebuild a provisional fleet. Children as young as twelve are being seized and forced into training camps to try to build up a flight corps. There's pockets of Corellian resistance, but in addition to General Verlack trying to single-handedly rebuild the fleet, dozens of envoys from other systems have come to buy arms and ships. Anyone not in the flight corps training camps is being forced to work eighteen hours a day in the factories. I think that we need to go there, along with as much of the Eurillian cell as possible, to try to help stabilize Corellia. The problem is if we neglect Sol Igat, the General Mogav will move forward with plans for deforestation of the Eastern Spanns to put down the native uprising, and there could be a genocide_. _And that still doesn't address the looming famine in Gamorr_. Ben pressed his face into his hands. _I dread every time Finn brings me a new stack of distress calls. They come from every quadrant, each more urgent than the last. Systems are crying out for help in the dark, and no one is coming to help them. What have we done?_

Rey released Ben and crouched beside him. Through a combination of pressure against his knee and insistence through their bond, Rey forced Ben to turn and face her. When he looked down at her, he was haggard. His eyes were red, he'd not shaven for a few days, and in a couple of places, streaks of purple stretched across his brow and cheek from the natural ink he'd been using for his stylus. Rey licked her thumb and tried to scrub off a streak that ran down his nose. She could feel Ben's annoyance through their bond, but he permitted it nonetheless.

 _You have to accept that we aren't going to be able to save everyone. Some of them are going to have to find ways to save themselves._

"This is our fault! The First Order was terrible, but at least there was order!" Ben stood and stormed away, but stopped before he reached the door.

Rey followed him, cautiously, preceding her touch with sympathy and affection through their bond. She could feel Ben struggling to rein in his anger and frustration, but by the time she wrapped her arms around him and laid her head in the center of his back, he was marginally calmer. _You can't blame yourself for this. This is what they wanted. They wanted to be free of the First Order_.

Ben laid his hands over hers. He sighed with bitter disappointment. _Not like this. Most of them didn't want to die to have it. So much of their misery is my fault . . . I have to take responsibility for fixing it. I have to do something._

Rey released him and came around to face him. She pushed his hair back and wrapped her hands around his face. "You did. You gave them a real chance to fight for their freedom, but you can't actually do the fighting for them." _You are so strong; you're so powerful—but you're still only one man_. Rey wrapped one arm around Ben's waist, and was encouraged when he pressed his face into her palm. _I love that you want to fix this, but you're allowing your despair to overcome you. There is so much love in you that pain and humiliation and hate could never drag you completely into the Dark Side . . . but I'm worried that your determination to do what's right and your despair will. You have to see the hope that you've created. You have to count the victories along with the losses, or you are going to be our greatest loss._

In their joined consciousness, Rey lifted the nascent flame that burned slowly between them. _I can't lose you now. There's so much to be thankful for . . . so much to hope for._

Ben reached out his consciousness and tenderly took the flame from her, and Rey could feel his despair and overwhelming guilt recede in the warmth of its light. _We haven't discussed_ . . .

Rey shrugged and smiled. _There hasn't been time. The entire galaxy fell apart, and that's the only thing there's been time to talk about for weeks._

Ben nodded thoughtfully. _When I can't see the path forward, I watch this. When everything becomes too much, I reach out for this in the dark, and you are both a comfort._ He took a deep breath and shrugged. _It doesn't help me find the answer, but it reminds me why I have to_.

Rey drew her consciousness away from the private place between their minds and pulled Ben down to her. She kissed him slowly, insistently, until she felt that he had laid aside his troubles for now, and he opened her mouth with his to return her kiss earnestly. _Come to dinner_.

For the first time in days, she could feel that Ben was fully present, and she felt his passion stir, both through their bond and through their touch. _I'm not hungry_.

 _I know_ . . . she pressed her eyes shut in pleasure and bit her bottom lip as his kisses followed the shape of her throat. Through their bond, she could feel his hum of approval when he felt her enjoyment of his touch expand within her. . . . _but it's your birthday, and the rest of the crew is expecting you to show up_.

 _What?_ Ben stopped abruptly, his lips hovering over the hollow of her throat. She felt his indecision, but then he hoisted her into his arms and continued kissing a path along the edge of her neckline past her clavicle. _No, it's not. You're mistaken_.

Rey laughed. "No, I'm not! Our minds are linked. I know perfectly well when it is."

Ben groaned and extracted his chin from the overlapping sides of her tunics. "I haven't marked my birth since I was six." _You really want me to stop?_

Rey tightened her grip around Ben's shoulders. _No . . . I don't_. "That's why we should do it now."

 _That's what I thought_. Ben lowered his face to Rey's throat, and started to follow the length of her clavicle, intending to find her shoulder with his mouth, though she could feel his amusement dancing along the length of their bond.

Rey cuffed him playfully in the back of the head. "Not this, the birthday. Dinner." Ben ran a hand up her thigh and pulled her tighter against his body. Rey felt a dizzying rush of pleasure, intensified the glow of Ben's rising enjoyment of the game. Trying to ignore both the simmering heat through their bond and the increasingly insistent things Ben was doing with his hands, Rey was barely able to choke out, "Now."

Ben smirked and lifted his brows. _Yes, now_.

 _No, later_. Rey gave him a quick, firm kiss that she hoped he would interpret as an affectionate 'no'. _Dinner, now_.

Admittedly happier than he had been in days, Ben sat his wife reluctantly back on her feet and kissed her again, more slowly, hoping to erase the 'no'. He gently teased back through the bond one last time, projecting feigned confusion, _Dinner? Now?_

Rey smiled against his kiss. "Mmm hmm. They are waiting. You haven't been home to celebrate your birth since you were six, and I think Chewie is looking forward to it." Rey lifted her brows and smiled with indulgent amusement. _He went hunting—there's going to be meat_. "Rose is threatening to come get you herself if you don't come soon. She said she's tired of your sulking, and if she has to eat whatever Chewie brought back, so do you."

 _I'm not afraid of Rose._

Rey gave him the 'no' kiss again. "You should be."

Rey deftly twisted out of his arms and looked back over her shoulder invitingly at him. Rey felt his stomach swoop through their bond, and she smiled, though she felt a thread of melancholy twisting through his desire. After everything he had done, knowing what he was, Ben was still dumbfounded that anyone could ever look at him the way Rey looked at him now. It both broke his heart and reforged it at once. Rey smiled encouragingly at him. _The Force made me specifically for you. Come to dinner_.

When Rey stepped out of their quarters, Ben's eyes fell on the stacks of notes on the table. He'd thought to shower and change before going to dinner, but perhaps just a few minutes more . . . _No!_ Ben looked up and saw his wife present, but not, beside the table, her arms crossed and looking pointedly at him. _Dinner, now . . . or nothing else later_. She smirked.

Ben grinned down at her wolfishly. _Fine. I'll be there in a few minutes._

Several sheets of blank paper lifted from the rusty metal tin where he kept them and settled down on top of the one he'd been working on to cover his work from his sight, followed by some kind of ceramic conduit Rey had absently left in their quarters several days prior. Rey flicked her eyes back up at him. _Make it a very few_.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Rey sat back beside Finn against a fallen tree outside the Falcon enjoying the rare treat of an evening spent outdoors, talk of war and death suspended by an unspoken agreement by all. Finn had apparently decided that fresh meat was safe to eat after all, and had finally set aside the broad saw-toothed leaves they had been using as bowls to hold the chunks of the roasted meat Chewie had proudly prepared. Rose had taken a single look at the scaled felines, with their rows of razor sharp spines over their shoulders, and decided she would try her luck foraging for fruit in the jungle. In the end, she had eaten some, but it had been with great skepticism.

Rey was pleased to see that, with a little encouragement, Rose was losing some of her fear of Ben. She watched with great enjoyment from across the fire as Ben disassembled the fragments of the shattered Skywalker lightsaber using the Force. Rose watched rapt, crosslegged and facing him. Since her time with Issaa, Rose had become almost ravenous for any type of instruction in using the Force, and Rey had felt that with just a little encouragement, her skills had expanded quickly.

Ben separated the components of the saber into an orderly line that hovered between them. He patiently identified for Rose the parts and explained their function, just as he had done for Rey a couple of weeks prior when she had continued to try to salvage the weapon.

"Could you fix it?" Rose whispered, enchanted.

Ben glanced back across the fire at Rey and allowed a sly grin to touch his lips. "I could, if Rey would let me have it when I was done."

Rey smiled, revisiting an ongoing and slightly tender topic. "It's not yours. It chose me."

Ben hummed skeptically. "My grandfather built it, and it was my uncle's first saber. I think most people would agree that, by rights, it should be mine." Ben glanced up from the slowly rotating components. "You really need to learn how to build your own. The Kenobi saber is a precious relic. There's not many of these Republic-grade weapons around anymore."

Rey wasn't willing to concede the Skywalker saber yet. "It was my first saber too. I almost killed Kylo Ren with it once."

Everyone went very still, and nervous glances flitted across the fire. Glancing at Rey, Ben brought all of the pieces of the saber back together, with only the case needed to be patched and soldered to make it whole.

He met her eye, and she felt affectionate warmth flow back to her through their bond. "Almost . . . Now that is a tale I'd like to hear some day." He cocked a brow and grinned. "It will be something to tell your children and your children's children."

Ben handed the nearly repaired saber to rose, pointing. "Do you think you could mend that there for me?" Rose looked shocked and a little awed that he would ask her personally to do something so important. "If you do, we can see if it will ignite tomorrow. Rey already rewired most of the electrical components; she has just been waiting for me to recalibrate the field energizers and realign the crystals properly."

As Ben stood and started to walk around the fire, Finn rolled his eyes, and Rey heard him huff under his breath, "Great. Now Rose thinks he's perfect and powerful and mystical too. Fantastic." She grinned at Finn, but looked up at Ben when he spoke, resuming their conversation.

"It was my understanding that Kylo Ren met his end at the hands of the last Jedi."

Rey took his proffered hand and allowed him to draw her to her feet. "That can't be true. I heard that Luke Skywalker's last apprentice also survived. There should always be at least two: a master and a student."

Ben clasped both of Rey's hands and brought them together. Studying them, he murmured, "I don't think Luke Skywalker would have claimed me as his own. Snoke certainly wouldn't have."

Rey squeezed Ben's long scarred fingers between her own. "We're not done yet. The Jedi aren't done yet. I don't think we've heard the last from Skywalker." Rey nodded back at Rose, struggling to levitate the husks of the enormous tropical tree nuts she'd found in a grove near the Falcon. "There are more Force users that need to be taught. I doubt he's going to stay silent for long."

Ben shrugged, but he couldn't conceal his pleasure watching Rose, her face screwed up in concentration, and her eyes focused on the husk as it finally lifted its bulk a few inches off the ground.

"That was a kindness, letting her finish repairing the Skywalker saber. I know you could easily have done it yourself. It goes a long way towards making them less afraid of you."

Ben nodded, turning his focus back to Rey. "I know. I'm not used to trying to please people, trying to make them comfortable . . . trying to make them like me." He grimaced, as though the notion was distasteful, and she felt his embarrassment. "It's much more efficient and effective to make them fear you."

Rey smiled as she pulled Ben's hands around her waist to encourage him to embrace her. When he did, she slid her hands up his arms and wrapped them around his shoulders. "I like you."

"That's a mercy. I understand you almost killed Kylo Ren." Ben bent low enough to whisper into her ear. "Terrifying."

Rey laughed softly. "Were you always this funny?"

Ben leaned back. "Yes, but when you're the right hand of the Supreme Leader, no one dares laugh. Only you laugh at me."

Rey smiled and started to lead Ben back into the Falcon. As she went, she caught the tail of a thought from Chewbacca, and she glanced his way.

Chewbacca sat further back from the fire, his hands propped behind his head where he leaned against an enormous tree, barely visible in the dark except for the reflected glow of the fire in his dark eyes. She realized now that he had sat far back from them so that he could watch Ben unobserved. The Wookiee sighed in contentment, and Rey caught his eye. Chewie nodded towards her in acknowledgement and gratitude, and she smiled before leading his foster son off to his bed.


	7. Chapter 7

When Poe Dameron dropped to the ground beside his battered X-Wing, it was with great trepidation. The last time he'd crossed paths with Kylo Ren, Poe had been strapped into a chair while Ren ripped information out of his mind when storm troopers had failed to torture the information out of him. To say the least, Poe wasn't looking forward to seeing Ren again.

Poe crossed the landing pad, careful not to trip in the tangle of vines that had braided themselves into a dense mat across what was doubtless a concrete pad somewhere deep below. BB-8 had remained back in the X-Wing, trying to repair a stabilizer that had broken loose when he'd dropped out of light speed. Poe's brows creased with concern as he approached Finn.

Finn stood rigidly outside the Falcon, arms crossed, watching something intently within the jungle that Poe couldn't see from his angle. Glancing up at Poe's approach, Finn nodded curtly and then turned his attention back to the jungle, his expression sour.

"What's going on?" Poe had spoken before he looked. Now that he saw what Finn saw, he felt his entire face tighten, and he clenched his jaw.

In a small clearing within the jungle, Kylo Ren, Rey, and Rose slowly worked their way through a form. A work lamp had been strung over a branch twenty feet above the clearing, and master and pupils worked in the pool of sickly, pale, artificial twilight that filtered through the branches of the thick canopy. All three of them had stripped down to base layers, and sweat-saturated shirts and tunics clung to glowing skin. Beads of sweat rolled down already slick skin in the dense humidity.

Sotto voce, Poe muttered, "What the hell is this?"

Finn threw him a look of bitterest disgust. "Since working with Issaa on Eurillis, Rose has been getting stronger. Rose can lift and move things with the Force now, so Ben has decided to start teaching Rey and Rose some basic Jedi forms."

Poe shot Finn a glance. "How do we feel about that?" Finn rolled his eyes but didn't answer. Poe quirked up a brow. "Oookay. Feeling great about it. Got it."

Poe glanced nervously at Kylo Ren, admittedly less terrifying without his mask and flapping cloak, but still threatening nonetheless. "Ben?"

Finn shrugged uncomfortably. He'd lived for the past few years of his life in abject fear that Kylo Ren's ire would turn itself on him. It was utterly surreal to try to reconcile the super-human monster that had inspired such fear with the wringing wet man slowly leading the two most important people in his life through basic Jedi forms. "That's what she calls him."

As they watched in barbed silence, Ben's deep, serene voice filtered through the dense air. "Lift up on the left foot . . ." Rose tried to follow the graceful lift that Ben and Rey were able to manage, but wobbled. Though she was behind him, Ben must have felt her struggle. "Just hold it. Breathe . . . you can pull the Force up through your stance to help hold you steady. Pull it up through your foot . . ."

Poe and Finn were surprised when Rose squeezed her eyes shut in concentration, took a deep breath, and her stance solidified. She looked as though she had been cast in stone. Rose herself was surprised when it worked, because her eyes popped open in wonder, and she nearly fell back off balance when she lost her concentration.

"Don't let go . . . pull it back."

Flustered, Rose closed her eyes again, breathed deeply, and pulled herself back up into the high stance.

"Good. Now step back, twist, and bring your top hand down for the strike."

As one, Rey and Ben made the strike. Rose topped over into the weeds. Ben's face crumpled in frustration, but at a glance from Rey, it cleared instantly. "Good, Rose. It will get easier with practice."

Rose sighed with relief and beamed up at Ben. Poe could hear Finn grinding his teeth together in irritation. Hopefully, Rose ventured, "I think it would help if I could see the entire form. I learn better by watching than by being told what to do."

Ben glanced at Rey uncertainly. "Do you want to try—"

Rey nodded. "If you just think a step or so before the next move, I think I can—"

Ben stepped to the center of the clearing beside Rey. "You'll learn better if we —"

Rey hummed her assent quietly, and she matched his stance a few paces away.

As they moved together in perfect synchronization through the form, Poe glanced at Finn. From the side of his mouth, he asked, "Are they always like this?"

Finn glanced at Poe. "What do you mean?"

"Finishing one another's sentences and leaving things half said."

Realization dawned on Finn's face. He'd become so accustomed to the shorthand way that Rey and Ben had started communicating with one another that he no longer took note of it. "Oh, yeah. You get used to it, and then you just ignore it. They don't really have to say anything to one another out loud." He grimaced and rolled his eyes again, but this time without resentment. "They get this kind of distant look when they are talking to one another through the Force bond, and I don't think either of them realize how stupid they sound to the rest of us."

Poe watched as Kylo Ren and Rey moved through the form. He noticed that either by accident of Ren's longer stride, or perhaps just due to the subconscious pull between them, within a few moves, they had stepped into one another's space. Though they were clearly doing the same form, Ren altered his strikes and stances so that Rey fit within them. By the time they closed their form, with hands held palm to palm and erect before their hearts, Rey stood within the circle of his arms, her crown just beneath Ren's chin. Ren and Rey stood perfectly still, eyes closed, except for their breaths, controlled and synchronized.

Poe leaned close to Finn. "Aaand how do we feel about that?" Rose sighed appreciatively, and Finn snorted in derision. "Ah."

The spell broken, Rey turned within Ren's arms, practically dancing on the spot. "That was amazing!" Poe was surprised to see the corner of Ren's lips twitch and then soften into a slow uncertain smile. "Why haven't we done that before?" When Rey reached up and pulled Kylo Ren down for an enthusiastic kiss, nearly knocking him off balance, Poe's mouth popped open in shock.

Finn grinned at Poe's consternation. He lifted his chin knowingly and cocked a brow. "Like I said, it takes some getting used to. I try to ignore it."

Poe tried to control his face as he watched Kylo Ren wrap his arms around Rey's waist and return her kiss. He could feel his features battle between horror, disgust, and, if he admitted it, a little bit of jealousy. Poe hoped that by the time Ren released Rey and turned his dark gaze on him, his face would display something at least civil.

Kylo Ren looked up sharply. When he walked towards Finn and Poe, Rey's arm still wrapped around his waist, Poe had to will his feet to stay planted to the ground. "You don't have to be civil. The last time we met was . . ." Ren paused, his lips slightly parted as though he rolled the word across his tongue in consideration. He slid his jaw sideways in discomfort. " . . . unpleasant." Ren ducked his head in obvious embarrassment. "General Organa held you in highest regard. I hope you will accept my apology for your rough treatment at the hands of the First Order."

Poe glanced uncertainly between Ren and Rey. "Um, OK. Sure . . . we'll call it . . ." Poe trailed off awkwardly, uncertain what to call it.

Without meeting his eye, Ren nodded. With a gentle squeeze and a kiss planted in her hair, Ren took his leave of Rey and strode past them into the Millennium Falcon. Finn, Poe, and Rey watched him go.

"He's trying. He really is."

Poe between Rey and Kylo Ren, his massive frame disappearing into the cargo bay of the Falcon. "The last time I saw him, he was torturing the location of the Skywalker map out of me. It felt like he'd scraped the inside of my skull with a spoon, run my mind through a meat grinder, and then shoved it back inside my head with a mallet. For weeks, every time I shut my eyes, all I saw was his mask looming over me as he combed through my mind. I'd never have guessed that that was what was behind the mask."

Rey looked down at her boots, disappearing into the thick vegetation. "He hates questioning people. He can taste their fear . . . "

"I heard he tortured you too."

Rey snapped her head up defensively, but after meeting Poe's gaze, she nodded slowly. "Yeah, a couple of times."

"Then how can you . . ." Poe wasn't sure how to put into words the depth of his revulsion at seeing Rey and Kylo Ren together. When he'd seen them on the Falcon before, Poe had assumed that Kylo Ren was somehow controlling her. Seeing them together, there was no question in his mind that Rey was genuinely besotted with Ren. Finn had told him how they were before he came, but hearing it and seeing it weren't quite the same.

Rey looked distantly into the Falcon's cargo bay, and absently stretched her fingers across her belly. "At first, all I could see was the mask and the monster. It took a long time before I found Ben Solo underneath. Once I did," Rey shrugged, "I realized that we were two sides of the same coin." Rey's mouth hardened as she looked into Poe's skeptical face. "He saved millions at Urobos Prime. What's left of the Resistance would have been dead by now if he hadn't torn the First Order from the sky. You would do well to remember that."

With a filthy look at both of them, Rey's boots pounded up the ramp into the Falcon. Poe goggled after her speechless. "What did I say?"

Finn smirked. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe you shouldn't have reminded her that Ben tortured her too." He sniggered. "Honestly, you looked like you were about to vomit."

Nonplussed, Poe asked, "How could she forget?"

Finn sighed and clapped Poe on the shoulder. "She didn't, but to her, Kylo Ren and Ben Solo aren't really the same person. Starkiller Base was another lifetime. I hate it, and I hate to admit it, but when the mask came off, he became hers." He lifted his chin in the direction where Rey had gone. "She's completely his."


	8. Chapter 8

Rey stomped through the corridors of the Falcon fuming.

 _Why are you so angry?_

 _He didn't have to remind me what it feels like to be questioned with the Force._

By the time she punched Ben's access code into their quarters, he had already showered and changed, and his hair hung in limp curls around his face. He watched serenely as she kicked off her muddy boots and tore the bands out of her sweaty hair.

 _Poe Dameron has every reason to hate me. He's a strong man with a strong will. I tortured him until he was screaming in agony, and he passed out once I'd gotten what I needed from his mind. If he'd resisted me for only a few minutes longer, I'd have broken his mind completely and left him an empty shell_. Ben sighed in resignation. _I'm not proud of it, but I deserve his hate and fear. Come here_.

In her frustration, Rey had tangled one of the bands in her damp hair as she tried to rip it out, and she winced as she struggled to extract it. She flopped down on the floor in front of Ben where he sat in his customary chair at the table. _Kylo Ren is gone. I hate that when they look at you, they only see him. They aren't even trying to see you for who you are_.

Ben worked in silence for a few minutes as his deft fingers untangled her hair. _You don't have to be offended on my behalf. Part of me will always be Kylo Ren. I know what I did, and I have to make my own amends where I can. He loved Leia Organa like a mother, and he sees me as the evil son she didn't deserve to be burdened with. The two of us together is hard for him to swallow_. With the wet bands all out of Rey's hair, Ben combed his long fingers through her damp tresses. His voice was tinged with pride and amusement as he continued, _He was very taken with you, you know. I think it's rare that Poe Dameron fails to get a woman's attention with just a smirk and a wink. He liked that you weren't taken in by his charm and appearance_.

Rey glared at Ben and levered herself up on his knee as she stood. _That doesn't work on me_.

Rey felt Ben's dark amusement filter through their bond. _Obviously._ Ben smiled with pride at his lover, his wife _. You did well today. It's hard to learn a form for the first time. Why don't you get cleaned up and rest before we have to meet with them again?_

 _I'm too angry to sleep._

When Rey stood, Ben pulled her close. He lifted the hem of her shirt and pressed a kiss into the salty skin of her belly. _You should try._ He could feel Rey's anger and frustration uncoil, though she wanted to clutch onto them. _Let it go, Rey. There's more important things to concern yourself with_. Ben plied her taught belly with another kiss and stroked his nose over her soft, damp skin, savoring her scent, his pleasure unfurling between them when Rey laced her fingers into his hair. _We asked him here for his help, remember? I'm going to need your help to convince him_.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"No." Poe glanced incredulously between Rey and Kylo Ren. "You've lost your minds. We don't have a fleet. We've got a few X-Wings and a couple dozen standard TIE fighters. Even if the TIE fighters could make the jump to hyperspace, we still wouldn't have the numbers to make any real difference on Corellia."

Ben took a deep breath. "We aren't asking you to take your fleet there. You're the de facto leader of the Resistance now. We want you to go with us to help negotiate a truce between the Corellians and what remains of the First Order. The last thing we want is for Verlack to be able to put together the seeds of a new Order." Ben turned to Finn. "Do you remember the Orsachi Massacre?" When Finn nodded solemnly, Ben continued, "That was Verlack. He's a true believer—that's why he was sent to Corellia—to ensure the security of the industrial complex that produced the First Order's fleet."

Rose looked up from a small fuel cell that she had disassembled on the table. "What's the Orsachi Massacre?"

Finn shared a dark look with Ben. "There was an uprising in Tellus 4." Finn shrugged. "It wasn't much of anything really, not at first. There's nothing of real value on Tellus 4. It's a dinky little moon way out on the furthest reaches of the Outer Rim. But it belonged to the First Order, and Verlack took it upon himself to take a division of troopers to put down the uprising. He landed in the center of the capital, Orsachi, and within a week, almost the entire native population of Tellus 4 had been slaughtered . . . and only twenty-three storm troopers survived the operation." Finn grimaced. "Of those, only a handful were still alive a year later. Weird things happened to the survivors of the Orsachi operation. There were a lot of suicides. Several of the troopers had to be decommissioned because they had started to self-mutilate. I heard one guy cut was cutting off his own fingers." Finn shook his head. "You heard crazy stuff about the troopers that came back from Orsachi—you were never sure what was true and what wasn't."

Reluctantly, Poe looked between Finn and Ren. "OK, we definitely don't want that guy building an army, but I thought there was some kind of crisis on Gamorr."

Ben tapped anxiously on the pitted surface of the table. "The First Order made sure Gamorr never had more than one month's surplus rations available at any one time. It was the only way they ever found to keep the Gamorrans in line. You can grow just about anything worth eating there, but the First Order seized nearly everything and shipped it off-world for processing. They kept the Gamorrans hungry. Gamorr breeds and trains some of the most ruthless, dangerous mercenaries in the galaxy, and after centuries of fighting one another and generations of Sith control, it is very volatile at the best of times."

Poe leaned on the table, hunching his shoulders. "How much food do they have?"

Ben shook his head. "I don't know, not really. They can't have more than two weeks of rations left, and there's nearly two standard months before they can start planting for their first growing season in the Broadlands. Another growing season recently ended, but I'm not sure if the Order had already seized the harvest and shipped it offworld for processing."

Poe sat back with a huff of exasperation and spread his hands. "How can you possibly expect us to fix that? Honestly, I don't even know where to begin."

"Why don't I go and assess the situation while you go to Corellia to deal with Verlack?"

Chewie moaned immediately in protest at Rey's suggestion, but Ben cut across him savagely. "You're not going anywhere near Gamorr. If anyone has to go alone, I will."

Rey and Poe spoke at once.

"What?"

"Why?"

Ben glared at Rey. "I said no."

Rey's brows drew down in sudden anger and she leaned forward against the table. "You can't just tell me—"

Ben placed a hand flat on the table and leaned menacingly into Rey's face. "Like hell I can't."

They glared at one another for a few seconds and a tense silence fell over the room. Ben reached out a coiled hand towards Rey, and Poe practically leapt from his seat, assuming Ren was about to strike her. Instead, Ben stroked the back of curled fingers down her cheek.

Ben continued quietly, "The Gamorrans like to take human concubines . . . and they do terrible things to them. You're still weak from Urobos Prime. If you were captured," _I'd lose everything I've ever had or will ever have in this world_. Ben lifted the flickering light that grew daily between them. _I had to wait my entire life for the two of you. I won't let you risk destroying it now_. "I'll let the Gamorrans rip one another apart and burn every last First Order barracks to the ground before I let you go anywhere near that system."

Poe watched the open show of tenderness between Kylo Ren and Rey in bald disbelief. When he opened his mouth to speak, Finn shot him a look and shook his head slightly to silence him.

Rey tightened her lips, hating conceding to anyone, but she could feel Ben's fear and resolve. She knew his demands were borne of his love for her, but that didn't make the concession taste any better. Reluctantly, she nodded. _OK, but I'm going to stay with you through the bond. If anything happens_ — Ben began to shake his head slowly, but Rey slammed her hand on top of his. "No! Listen to me!" Rey slid her hands up Ben's arms and clutched his shoulders in an iron grip. _If I lose you, the bond between us will be severed. I'll die_.

"No . . ."

"Yes!" Rey held up a trembling hand before his eyes, and every eye widened in surprise that she was still shaking weeks after Urobos Prime. _This can't come close to comparing to what will happen if the other half of my soul is severed. If you need me . . ._ Rey laid the trembling hand against Ben's cheek. He laid his own over it, pressing his eyes shut in comingled frustration and affection. _If you need me, I will always come. No matter the cost. That's what this is. Yes?_

Ben opened his eyes and looked into her with bitterest regret, knowing that if his situation were dire enough that she insisted on coming, he'd probably be powerless to prevent her. He nodded curtly and looked away. "Yes."

Glancing between them, Finn interjected, "Gamorr aside, I think Ben really needs to come with us to Corellia. Supreme Leader or not, Verlack is more likely to respond to a member of High Command than to any of us. He'll see immediately through the fiction of Commander Elsoth. I don't know that there's much we can do for the Gamorrans right now. We might be able to offer to set up trade with Eurillis, since their harvest is in, but that's a short term solution. If things are as bad on Gamorr as you say, trade will have to be initiated with more than just a couple of planets."

Ben stood and tapped on the dusty console that saw only occasional use in the refectory. He brought up a projection of the quadrant. "You're right, and Rey's right. We can't let the situation on Gamorr get any further out of hand with at least seeing what the situation is on the ground. If the rest of you continue directly to Corellia, I can stop at Gamorr on the way and arrive just a few hours behind you," he flicked his eyes up to meet Poe's hooded gaze, "but I'm going to need to use Commander Dameron's fighter to get there."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Ben crinkled his nose in distaste as he slid into the cockpit of the grimy X-wing. It had the same stale, lived-in odor as the Falcon, and everywhere he looked, he saw cross-wired circuits, the charred evidence of fire on the console, and particularly annoying, a long loop of twisted wire hung low from the overhead console and tickled at his ear. The glass over the targeting display was cracked, and the Arabesh on most of the keys on the console had been smudged away from decades of use. He sincerely hoped he wouldn't need to use whatever those keys controlled. Ben glanced over the configuration of the controls to orient himself, hoping that since X-wings were produced by the same manufacturer as standard TIE fighters, he'd be able to find the controls adequately through memory and intuition. _What a piece of junk_.

"Hey, watch it!"

Ben looked quizzically down at the landing pad where Poe looked up, offended. "Excuse me?" Ben glanced at Rey, who looked up at him grinning. _I didn't say anything_.

Rey's smile broadened. _You didn't have to. Your face said it all_. Teasing, she continued, _I can see why you needed the mask._

Poe snarled, "She might not be pretty, but she's got it where it counts." BB-8 beeped and whirred his tart approval. "And another thing—don't lose my droid!"

Ben rolled his eyes and took a deep breath. Raising the canopy, he leaned out of the cockpit. "I'm leaving you my wife. Surely I can be trusted with your fighter and astrodroid?"

Poe quirked a brow but refused to reply. Glancing at Rey, he muttered beneath his breath to Finn, "Seems like more than a fair trade to me. He's still got the girl, my plane, and my droid. All I've got are his orders to meet him on Corellia."

Finn grinned and clapped Poe on the shoulder. "Maybe, but at least we don't have to deal with the Gamorrans."

Finn and Poe crossed the landing pad back to the Falcon, leaving Rey alone. As the X-wing's engines accelerated through the take-off sequence, Ben looked down for a final glance at Rey. One hand was pressed to her mouth, and the opposite arm was pressed to her waist. She looked like she was about to be sick. She'd pulled up a barrier between them, but Ben could feel it trembling. Ben pressed a gloved hand against the canopy glass.

 _What's wrong?_

 _Nothing . . . I'm fine. Just go._

Ben's brows drew down in concern. "BB-8, hold the engines in standby." BB-8 whirred interrogatively, and the engines slowed back down to an idle.

Ben opened the canopy and vaulted from the cockpit. By the time he strode back to Rey, her face was wet.

 _What's wrong?_

When Ben opened his arms, Rey flew into them, pressing her face against the fine wool of his officer's coat. Humiliated, she let him glimpse the moments she had had to watch her parents fly away, Plutt's thick fingers restraining her. _I'm afraid if I let you fly away, I'll never see you again_.

Ben turned her face up, and showed her the moments when the Millennium Falcon had left him behind, clutching Luke's hand. His mother had covered her face so he wouldn't see her sobbing in the cockpit, but Han had refused to look at him entirely. _Do you honestly think I'd fly away and never come back for you? How could you think of all people, I'd abandon my own wife and child?_

Rey shook her head. _I hate watching you go_.

 _I'm never going to be more than a thought away._

Reassured, Rey pressed her face into his chest. _I know. It's only a few days_.

Uneasily, Ben agreed, _If I can manage it. It's going to be fine_.

After a last kiss, Ben crossed the tarmac to the X-wing. "Ladder, BB-8." Ben rolled his eyes as the droid condescended to lower the ladder, albeit reluctantly. It had taken significant convincing to get Dameron to even let him use the fighter for the hop to Gamorr. It had taken significantly longer for Dameron to convince the astrodroid.

Strapped back into the seat of the fighter, he glanced down at Rey, but wished that he hadn't. She was trying not to show how hard it was for her to watch him leave, and her lips were pressed so tightly together that they were white. Her hands were balled into fists and pressed to her ribs beneath her crossed arms. The sight of her alone beneath him cut Ben to the core. He reached out over the console and his hand trembled with indecision. Every moment she stood there, silently shattering, his resolve to leave her to try to assess the situation on Gamorr flagged. He knew that if he looked her in the eye again, he wouldn't be able to take off, so he stubbornly turned his face away.

In his mind's eye, he saw his father's handsome, rugged face, turned away with his lips knotted and his eyes trained on the horizon out the Falcon's windows. All his life, he'd thought that his father had been in such a hurry to leave him behind, that his son had meant so little to him, that he couldn't even spare him a glance before he took off. His last sight of his father had been Han refusing to look at him, and that image had burned in him for decades. Ben remembered begging silently, crying out to Han in his mind, wishing that his father would just look at him, hoping against hope that he'd just come down the ramp and take him back.

Never in his life had Ben ever left the hangar for a mission and felt the pull of a loved one in his wake. Never before had someone actually cared if he returned. With his own lover on the ground below him, looking up into his cockpit with the same longing he'd once thrown forlornly into the cockpit of the Falcon, the truth struck Ben, and it was almost a physical blow. Han had never wanted to leave him behind. If Han had felt even a fraction of the regret that Ben felt leaving Rey behind, Ben had misunderstood his father his entire life. Han hadn't looked away out of indifference. He'd looked away because if he had had to see his son's face before he left him behind, his heart would have been shredded.

Speaking only to himself, Ben said, "I have to go." Flipping the last few switches to prepare the plane for takeoff, the X-Wing wobbled as it left the ground. Unable to stop himself, Ben looked down at Rey. _I love you._

She smiled tremulously. _I know._


	9. Chapter 9

By the time Ben dropped out of lightspeed and the autopilot established an orbit around Gamorr, he was feeling less and less certain that he'd made the right decision. The further he got from Rey, the more uneasy he became, and he was tempted to turn the X-Wing right back around. Sighing, he punched in the code to access the Gamorran comms channel, but all he got was static.

"BB-8, scan through the other frequencies. See if you can find a channel with something besides static coming from Gamorr."

While he waited, Ben tried hailing the First Order control center, but all that he could pick up was a weak distress signal on a secured frequency. He punched in the access code, and amidst the sonic snow, he heard screaming, blaster fire, and finally, a panicked voice hissed hoarsely, "Mayday, mayday. Request immediate assistance. Gamorr Ground Command overrun. I repeat, command overrun. All stations are reporting heavy losses, situation is critical. Provisional fleet has been destroyed, and all freighters are under enemy control. We are unable to evacuate, we require immediate assistance." A chorus of anguished screams cut through the recording and were silenced abruptly. "Damn it all! If you are out there, send backup now!" After a piercing squelch, the recording repeated.

"BB-8, any luck?" When the droid purred a negatory, he asked instead, "What is the date-time stamp on that message?"

BB-8 didn't respond. "BB-8?"

Finally, BB-8's answer came, clipped and without his usual emotive flair. Ben ground his teeth together and tightened his fists on the console of the X-wing. The distress call had been issued weeks ago, only hours after he and Rey had destroyed the First Order fleet around Urobos Prime. Apparently the Gamorrans had leapt into action to throw off their oppressors the moment they knew the Order was distracted.

Ben clenched his jaw, trying to decide what to do. When BB-8 asked tentatively if he should plot a course for Corellia, Ben ignored him. He knew it was folly, but he couldn't leave the system without seeing what had become of his men. He would have to trust to the Force to get him back out.

Ben pulled a hand-held holo out of his pocket and set it on the console. Sliding his finger along the side of the holo, hundreds of planetary systems whirred by until he found a chart for Gamorr. He was only vaguely familiar with Gamorr, but he remembered that there was a particular First Order outpost set high in the primary mountain range bisecting the main continent of Gamorr. It was remote, but with its high vantage point, it had been used to coordinate the comms for the Gamorran Ground Command, and he'd likely be able to access the security footage for all First Order stations from this central location. If he could reach it. If it still existed. If, if, if.

Ben tore off his glove and used his thumbnail to clean off the carbon crusting the input jack on the X-wing's console. Jacking in the holo so that BB-8 would be able to access it as well, Ben enlarged the holo and tapped delicately at the projection in the general vicinity where he thought the comms station was located.

"BB-8, can you plot the coordinates for this location?" When BB-8 chirped happily, pleased that he could do something to help his temporary master, Ben answered, "Load them into the autopilot and get us there. There should be a landing pad on the ridge just below."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Ben climbed down from the cockpit of the X-wing cautiously, but all around him there was quiet in the pre-dawn dark. Unbidden, BB-8 rolled up next to where Ben crouched with a nocturnal scope, scanning the surrounding forest for heat signatures of other life forms.

Glancing at the droid, Ben hissed, "No, BB-8, stay here! I need you to be able to get the plane ready at a moment's notice if we are discovered."

BB-8's head slipped to the side, in what Ben couldn't decide was curiosity or ironic sass. The droid whirred quietly, and at Ben's feet appeared a faint projection of Rey. Her voice trickled through BB-8's speakers. "I know he won't want to take you, but make him. I can't be there to watch over him, so you need to do it. Don't let him go anywhere without you, do you understand?"

Rey's likeness vanished, and Ben rolled his eyes at the droid. BB-8 rocked expectantly and tipped his head further. "She would insist. Are you going to listen to me, now, or just do what she told you to do?"

The droid chirped merrily and then sputtered in derision. "Of course you are." Ben regarded the droid for a moment in amused annoyance, sliding his jaw to the side as he considered the droid and what to do with him. "Alright, you can come, but be quiet. If I lose you, I don't think Dameron will give me my wife back."

It took only ten minutes or so to follow the rocky path from the landing pad up to the station. BB-8 made so much noise clunking over the rough-cut stone that Ben finally hoisted the droid into his arms and carried him much of the way. At the head of the trail, the comms station stood vacant, its wan light flickering. Once they were inside the facility, Ben sat BB-8 down on the slick floors, and they crept carefully through the corridors, hoping that either the security cameras for the station had been disabled, or at least they weren't being monitored.

Everywhere they looked, Ben saw the signs of battle. The walls and ceiling were scorched regularly from blaster fire, and along the walls and floor were frequent spatters and smears of blood, but there were no bodies.

After the sixth or seventh empty room, Ben knelt by BB-8 and whispered, "Are you recording this?" BB-8 shook his head and whirred interrogatively. "I want you to record our trip through the station. Something's not right."

Ben closed his eyes, and did what he should have done as soon as they arrived, but had been reluctant to try since Urobos Prime. He tapped his connection to the Force, though it felt raw and jagged. He raced through the building, searching for anything living. Ben's face twitched in surprise when he found them.

Ben strode through the corridors nearly at a run, something between panic and revulsion rising in his throat. Though he thought he knew what he would find, he had to see it for himself. As they wound their way deeper into the station, the ambient temperature dropped, and soon Ben could see his breath. Finally, Ben opened the door to the assembly commons, and a blast of icy air swirled around the edges of the door. Ben flicked his fingers, and the lights to the chamber winked on. When Ben saw what the room contained, his gorge rose immediately in horror, and he knelt beside the wall emptying his stomach.

Ben wiped his mouth against the back of his glove as he looked up at the ceiling, counting, calculating. The Gamorrans had thriftily found a way to prevent their famine and liberate themselves from their oppressors in a single stroke. The panels of the dropped ceiling had been removed, and from the steel beams that ran the length of the assembly commons were hung row after tidy row of disemboweled flayed human corpses, all blanketed in a thin veil of frost. A drain had been drilled through the building's foundation into the bedrock of the mountain so that the carcasses could drain, though the floor had been hosed down and sterilized some time ago. Ben counted again with his eyes to be sure, and he calculated that at least two hundred men were here, many more than would have been stationed in this location alone.

Disgust and rage competed in Ben. These had been his men. They were his responsibility, and he had allowed them to be slaughtered and butchered like livestock. Ben set his jaw and glared at the corpses. There was no one to be saved, but he'd be damned if he left his men's remains to be feasted on by the Gamorrans. They could starve.

BB-8 moaned softly, mournfully, and Ben glanced down at the droid. He needed to find out if this was the only facility where the Order's troops had suffered this fate, or if this had been a coordinated attack across the planet. Ben strode through the halls to the base of the comms tower. He was relieved to find the doors deadlocked, though they yielded immediately to his personal access code. Of all the station, only this room appeared to have been left untouched.

"BB-8." The droid swiveled its head up interrogatively. "How much available data storage do you have?" BB-8 buzzed. "That might be enough if we run a compression algorithm. I need you to hook into the main computers, cordon off the entire central network and archived databases. Compress everything—" BB-8 purred inquisitively. "Yes, I want it all." Ben's hands flew over the console. "I have input top-level security clearance and given you full access to all communication channels and archived data. Do you have access now?" BB-8 hummed his assent. "Good. I want you to pull down the data from all of the local servers in the First Order system. Once you have done that, I want you to wipe the memory banks for the entire local network. How long will that take?"

BB-8 paused, calculating. When he responded, Ben frowned, looking out the plate glass window wall surrounding the comms tower's control room. The sky had begun to lighten, and he wanted to be out of the station before the sun had the opportunity to climb any higher in the sky. Their window of opportunity was closing if they were going to get back off Gamorr without being detected.

Ben nodded. "Do it."

While BB-8 concentrated on packaging the data in the servers for download, Ben pulled up and reviewed footage from the hours immediately following the Battle of Urobos Prime. Though the attacks had not been coordinated, within days, every single station had been hit. Gamorr had been one of the most heavily guarded First Order planets, both because of its instability and value as a mass producer of food stuffs. By his estimation, nearly two million First Order troops had been killed and dressed for cold storage. Most of the stations had security cams in the cold storage areas, and as he flicked between camera feeds, all he saw were row after row of trussed carcasses.

Ben considered what to do about it for several minutes before pulling up the server operating the environmental controls for all stations. His heart felt as though it would beat out of his chest as his hand hovered over the display. The Gamorrans had lived for centuries at war, and for generations under the lash of usurpers. A part of Ben reasoned that they had rightfully risen up against the Order to take back their homeland. The rows of frozen corpses appeared in his mind, and he could almost taste the way the room had smelled, antiseptic, cold, and sweet. He may have come here to avert a famine and try to save the Gamorrans, but he wasn't willing to let them rebuild their world with the bones of his own men. The decision made, Ben splayed his fingers on the display, and slid them from the bottom of the screen to the top, raising the ambient temperature in every facility from below freezing to over a hundred degrees. He couldn't give his men an honorable burial, but he could at least make their flesh unfit for consumption. He hoped that whatever gods they had worshipped would prefer to see them rot than eaten.

As he worked, BB-8 purred another inquiry. Ben glanced down at him. Used to the strictly functional programming of droids on First Order vessels, he was consistently surprised by the variety of personality quirks that these independent units had picked up and integrated into their programming. "No, twelve minutes is fine, I just wish it could go faster."

After another inquiry, Ben continued, "I'm reprogramming the distress beacon and boosting its power so that it will draw from the other linked stations and increase its range. I'm quarantining the planet of Gamorr, telling the galaxy that there is a pandemic here." Ben grinned darkly out the windows at the stars disappearing into the pink dawn. "I've reprogrammed the Order's automated defense grid to go into effect in one hour, and any ships that try to enter or leave atmo after that time will be shot down immediately. By the time anyone decides to come close enough to try to find out what their status is, what remains of the Gamorran population will either have survived the planet's worst famine, or there will be nothing left of their foul species." BB-8 chirped. "No. There's triple power redundancy beneath this station, and it has its own reactor core buried deep within the mountains. They would have to dig up the entire mountain to get that reactor out. This distress beacon and air defense grid could run for thousands of years on the fuel cells that are powering it. With the reactor back-up, it could operate for millennia."

BB-8 moaned, and Ben sensed he was distressed. "I did come here to save the Gamorrans, but that was before I found out they slaughtered every last one of my men. I couldn't save the troops, and I won't lift another finger to try to save the Gamorrans. They will have to figure it out on their own. Dameron is right. I can't save everyone." Ben gazed out at the lightening sky and continued quietly, "Maybe not everyone is worth saving."

Suddenly, warning lights began to flash and a klaxon began to blare through the facility. "Damn it! It's time to go, BB-8!" Ben rapidly keyed in his authorization code to finalize the changes he had made to the system, and he sprinted from the control room, BB-8 rolling along at his heels.

As they neared the entrance to the facility, four enormous Gamorrans blocked their path. The hulking guards were dressed in the traditional leather bodkin, metal epaulets and gauntlets, and long, shaggy fur tunics that had been their common dress for hundreds of years. In the dim, flickering light, their mottled green skin looked a sickly gray. He couldn't tell if their deep-set squinty eyes, heavy brows, and long snouts were clinched in anger or resolve, and he didn't particularly care. All he could see is that they stood between himself and Dameron's ancient X-wing and his family on the other side of the galaxy. He'd reset the defense grid to give them only seventeen minutes to leave the system before it went into full automation, and Ben was prepared to cut his way through them if he had to.

Ben tore his saber away from its clip on his belt, and deflected the barrage of blaster fire that rained down upon them as he hurtled through the corridor. When one Gamorran stepped into his path, Ben swiped at the air before him, slamming the Gamorran into the wall of the corridor hard enough to punch a hole through to the adjacent room. The remaining Gamorrans ignited riot control batons that had been taken from the facility barracks and altered so that electrical current arced wildly from the end of the weapon. One of the Gamorran's flicked his wrist, and a tongue of current unfurled through the corridor and climbed up the wall. Though Ben threw himself into the opposite wall to try to avoid the tendrils of electricity, swunging his saber wide to deflect it, it crawled up his arm and left it numb. He barely retained his grip on his saber.

Deciding that it might be better to just avoid the Gamorrans, Ben turned sharply into a side corridor, glancing behind to ensure that BB-8 followed. To his horror, Ben found that the corridor ended in a bank of windows with no other exit, and the three Gamorrans were close on his heels. As he neared the end of the corridor, Ben realized gratefully that the bank of windows overlooked the ridge where the X-wing waited for them.

Glancing over his shoulder to find the droid, Ben wrapped an envelope of force energy around BB-8, and flung him through the wall of glass. Without a second glance, Ben leapt into the void beyond after the droid. Ben tried to use the Force to soften their landing, but he heard BB-8 shriek as his body slammed against an outcropping of stone, though seconds later, he saw the droid rolling at top speed back to the fighter. Ben managed to land on his feet, but the force of the landing flung him to the ground and forced the air from his lungs.

In the strengthening dawn, Ben could see that more Gamorrans were swarming over the ridge, but he was able to pull himself into the cockpit and slam down the canopy before any of the Gamorrans reached him. He was grateful that BB-8 had already started the take-off sequence, and as he punched in the coordinates, BB-8 got them off the ground. They started to approach the inner atmosphere, though they were under heavy ground fire.

Ben was hampered by his numb hand, and in frustration, he shifted control of the plane to BB-8. "BB-8! We have less than two minutes to exit the atmosphere before that defensive shield goes online. Get us into hyperspace now!"

BB-8 squealed nervously. "I know! Disable the safety protocol. We won't survive a direct hit from the surface cannons once that shield is up. Now! Do it—"

Ben's head snapped back against the back of his seat as the X-wing abruptly jerked into hyperspace. The entire fuselage vibrated for several seconds as the plane struggled to escape Gamorr's gravitational field. Fighting against the internal force of the fighter, Ben's working hand crawled across the console, and he was able to manually engage the X-wing's inertial dampeners. The fuselage stopped shuddering, and after a slight pause, the fighter snapped into hyperspace.

Ben sighed with relief, knowing that they were close enough to Corellia that he'd be able to rendezvous with the Millennium Falcon within the hour. Ben pressed his eyes shut and reached out to Rey, and he felt her perched nervously on the edge of his mind.

 _Are you all right?_

 _Yes. We are off Gamorr and headed to Corellia._

Rey's concern was electric, and it wrapped around Ben's mind, causing its own kind of suffocating discomfort. He realized now that she had remained uncharacteristically silent while he had been on Gamorr, as though she watched from a very great distance. _What happened? I can feel there's something wrong with your arm._

 _It's nothing—the numbness will wear off. We need to regroup before we go to Corellia. I don't dare try to face Verlack unless we can fight our way out if we have to. Have Chewie meet me on one of the twin moons. There's several possible spots, but he will know the best one. Get the coordinates and I will refigure my trajectory._

 _Ben . . . I'm glad you're headed back._

Ben sighed and tried to flex the fingers of his tingling hand. _You might not be when you find out what I've done_.


End file.
